{matters of the heart} on hurdles

Hurdle. An obstacle or difficulty. For example, "There are many hurdles to overcome." Similar words are barrier, stumbling block, obstacle, hindrance. No matter how you define it or say it, a hurdle is one thing for sure - a discouragement.

I was finally set up to get the optimizer device - the one that is supposed to help my heart. At first, I was told all these wonderful things about it and then brought in to sign the consults only to be told that I didn't qualify. Then later I was told I did qualify for it, so I got approved and the surgery was scheduled. Three days before the surgery, I received a letter in the mail from my insurance company saying that they would not authorize it because it wasn't "medically necessary." The hospital got everything straightened out with the insurance company on Monday.

I woke up this morning feeling anxious. My stomach hurt. My heart was racing. I felt shaky. I was so ready to get this procedure over with. I packed my hospital bag, and just as we were about to walk out the door, the phone rang. Ochsner. The nurse said the hospital was busy today, and the doctor asked her to reschedule. She's going to call me later and see if they can get me in next week.

Satan is working overtime, y'all. To tell you I am okay with this would be a lie. I planned time off work. I left plans for a substitute. I was ready.

There's a reason I'm not having this surgery today. I know that there's something in God's plan that kept me from going to New Orleans today, and even though I'm so frustrated, I'm trying to accept that. The nurse said she will call me later today to reschedule, hopefully for next week.